Oh man, has it been a good week, good but tiring. The past week and a half have been a whirlwind and there wasn’t even all that much dating activity to speak of. Work has been steadily hectic, and I went on vacation, but not a vacation for my body! I went back to Cornell for my five year reunion and three crazy nights of heavy drinking with old friends and new, a very excellent time.

I suppose first we can flash back to my only date of the week last Wednesday. Looking back it seems kind of boring. I went on a third date with Organic Yoga girl, who will now be referred to Hand Job girl, because of her preferred method of getting men off. Come to think about it I may never refer to her again. The date was pretty non-descript. Ate some dinner, went for a walk, and then back to my place for some HJ action!

Ah that sounds so horrible! Who the fuck gives HJ’s anymore?!?! It’s messy and it doesn’t feel all that good until it is over. Seriously I might as well do it myself. Basically, she doesn’t want to do anything more than that until she is in a committed relationship. After this weekend that is not happening. Well maybe I will tell her what she wants to hear but keep playing the field. On to the good news, while visiting my alma mater I hooked up with not one but two girls who were both better than this one. It’s tough to come back to HJ so she might be out.

On Friday, I woke up at the fraternity house and went back to my dorm room on campus, where over the course of three days I actually never slept in. I had to go back up there for an organized wine tour with a bunch of friends and friends of friends. I took the back middle seat and waited for the bus to fill. The last chick on the bus happened to be some tall glass of water that lived in my freshman dorm, and I was never friends with her. She came to the back and sat with me. Through the course of the wine tour we got really drunk and developed a pretty good rapport. We were all flirty and took lots of pictures but nothing really happened.

In fact, once the wine tour ended, we parted ways and did our own thing. There were a bunch parties going on-campus, and we had our own friends to catch up with so it seemed we not be hanging out any longer. I was pretty drunk after the wine tour, and as the night wore on, I got more and more incoherent. At the close of the bars, I decided to walk back from the bar to the fraternity house with some friends. Out of nowhere, Tall Drink of Water appears, and all of a sudden we are walking hand and hand up towards the arts quad. I can’t really tell you what we talked about but at the top of the quad we were going to part ways. We made out for a bit and that was that. Looking back I wonder why I didn’t go back with her and try get some more but its all good.

You know why?? Because I got some more the next night! Yeah way more! Saturday night I found myself equally, if not more drunk than the previous nights. I spent some time on the arts quad, and fraternity house drinking. I almost even got arrested by campus police. Somehow later in the evening I found myself on the fraternity porch with nice undergraduate student in my lap. According, to others who were there we were sucking face all for quite a bit of time. Sucking face so hard I had to come up for air. At which point, I would profess my love for her to the crowd, say things like “Diry, Dirty!”

At some point shortly thereafter, I found myself upstairs with her in an undergrad’s room. With just enough time to get undressed we got kicked out by the unhappy tenant of the room. After that we went back to her place. You can guess what happened there. Next thing I know it is 10AM and I am in an empty bed. I roll around and realize I am in this chicks place, but don’t even know here name. Luckily, she had some sorority photo to tell me what I needed to know.

Sweet, sweet Shannon… I did know your name the night before as I shouted it out to the crowd. I had to leave shortly thereafter because her father was on the way. Eeek! But it was okay, it was a beautiful morning, the birds were chirping, and the sun was shining as I ended my weekend.

So as it turns out online dating is good practice for real life. If both of these sweet Cornell girls find there eye’s on this writing I would hope they find it somewhat tasteful. They are both intelligent and hot women who I would take out to dinner any day of the week so next time you are in town look me up…

Well, that’s all she wrote for this week, well this past week. I will need a few days to recover but I have atleast two chicks ready to go so expect some more stories soon.

It’s been a busy week but that didn’t stop me from getting on a couple of dates. This past Wednesday I went on a spur of the moment date, just the way I like things. This girl I had been shooting around emails and IM’s wanted to go out on the fly. She lived on the UWS so we decided we didn’t need to go any further south. I decided to walk across the west side to meet her. She was definitely the cutest chick I met so far. Unfortunately, she was not so intelligent, to put it nicely.

I met her on 104th and Park West. Neither of us knew much about the area so we just decided to wing it. We walked about 15-20 blocks for a chill bar with little luck. There were a lot of cheesy upscale bar restaurants that didn’t cut it. Finally we found a Mexican place to sit down and chill. Can’t go wrong with some margaritas, Right? Wrong. The drinks were overpriced and watered down. The chick ordered some fruity ass frozen margarita that was so sweet she couldn’t even finish it.

The conversation was pretty weak too. This chick was just so scatterbrained and not very bright. On the plus side she was a fine peice of ass. She had a whole bunch of stupid shit to say. Conversational gold tidbit #1, “I like to think of myself as old at heart.” Who the hell says that? Earlier in the night, I told her about my international travels. Not too long after she asked me if I had ever left the country. Derp! Then a few minutes later she out of nowhere says “Sure I’ll try your drink,” when I didn’t even say anything.

The best part of the Mexican place was probably the funny gay waiter who had a crush on me. Nice guy but I wasn’t really into it. After a disappointing drink, we decided to find somewhere else to go. We walked another 20 or so blocks to the Abbey Pub where she bought a round of drinks. One cool thing about her was that she liked to drink the hard shit, scotch, no rocks. Classy shit.

Things went from better to bad to worse. Her phone went off. She said something to the effect of “I can’t believe I heard that,” and proceeds to pick it up and talk loudly to someone who I am pretty sure was a dude. Then she tells me some dumb story twirling batons in the park. Somehow the conversation got to sexual innuendos, and she confessed she learned about “tossing the salad” the previous evening. The best part was that she had though it meant going down on a chick. I could just picture her one day feeling dirty and wanting her salad tossed, and getting one unpleasant surprise. What a dumbass!!!

On Friday, I went out with Organic Yoga chick for a second date. Nothing too interesting here but I did get some. She wants the Z. We got some dinner, went to a bar and got drunk. Then I took over to the park where we started making out. I then convinced her to come back to my place to drink some wine and that lead to some more hanky panky. So the long short is the dating is starting to pay off some. I am not in love with this chick but she is a good time. I am pretty busy this weekend but will continue to play the field…